So, the RPM Holiday Challenge has preoccupied my thoughts for days now. I lifted my self-imposed ban "No Christmas Music Until The Weekend After Thanksgiving" and dove into my collections like a celibate at the Bunny Ranch after winning at the tables. I pulled up Bing Crosby from the 1930's and beyond, Sinatra from the 40's and 50's, Dean, Perry...all the classics. Yes, yes, I admit that G Fox, with the distorted gitazz and loud drums and sh*tty, raspy vocals really, truly, deeply loves those old, old Christmas albums. I have Duke Ellington's band covering The Nutcracker...f***ing brilliant. I have a boatload, on my 30GB MP3 player, I think about 8-9GB of the memory is all of that stuff. I even dragged out Sarah McLachlan's Wintersong to grab hold of her version of "In The Bleak Midwinter" By the way, I heard she split with her husband...sad for them, but maybe now she and I can finally meet. But I digress.
So anyway, I see Josh and BPK's announcement about the Challenge and decide instantly to do it. I promptly put together a playlist of my favorites and started listening, per the above paragraph, over and over. I started doing a little demo work over the weekend, mainly some gtr or keys with rough vox to see what sounded good with what so that come November I can dive in and record 3-4 songs and pick the best. And here comes reality, hitting me harder than a double-bladdered cow peeing on a rock.
I had completely forgotten the fact that I can't sing. No, really, I can't. I can do my own stuff of course, but that's because no one knows what it really should have sounded like. Some of you have seen a post I made a few months back about someone likening my voice to the guy from Guadalcanal Diary, Murray Attaway. Well, if I have the soul of Bing, but the voice of Murray, then I am in a world of hurt. You will be too if I go down this path any further and let you hear it. I listened back to my roughs, mainly a half verse here, a partial chorus there and I am beginning to think I have the voice of Murray from the Mary Tyler Moore show. Ahhh yes, the dulcet tones of Gary Fox as Gavin Macleod...Love Boat anyone?
So, where does this leave me? Well, here, writing this ludicrous blog. And yes, in case you were wondering, I am still on pain pills (per my Rock and Recovery blog a few days ago). Will I still do the Holiday Challenge? Oh sure, definitely, but with a different focus than I originally thought. Perhaps I should stick to my talent level, so "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer" suddenly looks good to me. Or the Makenzie brothers' Twelve Days of Christmas, and a beer in a tree.
Good luck to me, eh? Oh sure, hoser.
Cheers,
Gary
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